Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
Randomize
