he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
