ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
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