did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
Randomize