We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
