He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Randomize