Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
