Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
