i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize
