so that wasnt chicken after all
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize