I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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