Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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