Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
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