This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Randomize
