real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
