you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Randomize
