I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
Randomize
