New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
Randomize
