So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize