Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
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