This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
They are going to name an STD after you.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
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