Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize