yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
