if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Randomize
