and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Randomize
