real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
