My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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