I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize