As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
The Olympian is in my bed
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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