No awkward lesbian experiences without me
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
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