if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
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