one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
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