Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
