i think my mom watched the whole time
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
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