Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Randomize
