yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Randomize
