she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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