Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
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