Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
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