After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize