HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
I think i got beer on your cat.
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