What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize
