I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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