But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
i dont even know how to be here
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Randomize
