Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
honey bunches of taint.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
Randomize
