he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
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