My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Randomize
