why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
