Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
Randomize
