Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
I could have mohawked her pubes.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
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